No Resentment in Concentration Camp

By Fang Ren-nian

Are we supposed to forgive and pray for those murderers who have committed big crimes?

Marjorie Jackson is the pastor's wife in my church in New Jersey of the United States. She has had an experience that others would consider extremely grievous, but she is able to completely free herself from hate thanks to her faith and love. I'd like to share some of her experience with brothers and sisters from Mainland China who, like me, have once indulged themselves in hatred.

Port of separation

It was a day in January of 1938, just a few days after Marjorie's sixth birthday. Her parents David and Katherine brought their kids from Kunming via Vietnam to Hong Kong. They planned to send Marjorie and her brother Jim by ship to Yantai where they would go to a boarding school for the children of missionaries.

The wind was strong in the sea. Katherine tightened up her little daughter's jacket and kept reminding her to tighten up her scarf when the ship set out to prevent it from being blown into the sea. The voyage to Yantai was long and dangerous. Especially after the Sino-Japanese war broke out, the entire Northern China had become a battlefield. It was anybody's anxiety having to send two kids under ten years of age to cross over half of China to the boarding school. And yet even before their parents got married in Shanghai in 1927, they had had separate contracts with churches in China that once they were married and had kids, they would send them to the Yantai boarding school when they reached six. This would enable them to perform their ministries in the inner China without family burden.

Such contracts might seem unreasonable: forcing parents to separate from their kids and to meet only once a year. But this was indeed necessary for the sake of the ministries in China, the economic situation and the need of children education. So ever since the kids started to talk, the parents had started to teach them to know the Lord and to love the Lord so they would be mentally ready. Once they turned six, they would leave their parents and live an independent life at boarding school. Marjorie's brother went two years earlier. This time he was going back to school after a vacation, just in time to bring Marjorie along with him to school.

Katherine bent over to her daughter, who probably noticed her mother's tears. She said to her mom with her crisp voice: "Don't cry, Mom. Didn't you tell us that Jesus would never leave us and abandon us?" Jim also came to them, holding Mom with one hand and little sister with the other, and said like an adult: "I have grown up and I will take good care of Marjorie. We also have the best teachers. We have Jesus!" The kids' faith and comforting words helped ease the pain of the mother.

The ship was about to set out. Dad held the whole family together and prayed for the children: "Dear Father, we place our kids in your hand. They are small and weak, but they love you and trust you. You have given us this promise: 'Your children will follow the Lord's teachings and your children will have great peace.' Oh Lord, we know you will lead them all the way..." Who could have predicted, though, that this departure was the beginning of almost seven years of separation, except for a few days of get-together that Christmas? Without any communication whatsoever, the kids spent three full years in a Japanese concentration camp.

The concentration camp

Early fall of 1943, the Japanese soldiers imprisoned over one thousand six hundred foreigners in a concentration camp in Weifang, Shandong Province. Over two hundred of them were the teachers and students of the Yantai boarding school. The camp was full of bad smell because of hot weather and crowdiness. Fresh air was only available early in the morning.

About seven o'clock in the morning, prisoners could hear the familiar songs coming out of the concentration camp. The children were singing hymns during their morning prayers: "The Lord is our fortress; the Lord is our strength; the Lord is our deliverer..." "He alone is our rock, our delivery; He is our fortress and we will not be shaken..." The crisp children's voice was full of love, enthusiasm and hope. The songs carried the Lord's message to everyone - He has not forgotten any of the prisoners here and He will deliver. The songs also became purifiers for them, wiping out their fear, resentment and malice. Whenever the prisoners heard the songs, they would stop doing what they did and look up at the piece of sky they could see.

One day, the Japanese soldiers learned that all boarding school children with American nationality were to be sent back to America by ship. Katie, Marjorie's cousin, was going to leave the concentration camp and return home. What a miserable departure for Marjorie, who was not able to go home because she was of Canadian nationality. Seeing all this, a boarding school teacher comforted those who were left behind: "Children, do not hate the cruelty of the Japanese. Do not complain about lack of justice. We must realize that the Lord has His own will while allowing all this to happen. Just like Daniel being thrown into the lions' den, or Joseph being imprisoned in the Egyptian jail, the Lord will carry on His will and fulfill His great plans. The Lord is always with us and, when time comes, He will bring every one of us to reunite with our parents."

The bell rang. Katie and other American students came out of the crowd. They formed two lines and they walked past the Japanese guards and out of the gate that nobody else could go through. Katie frequently turned back to wave her hand, while Marjorie's tears were streaming down. Time and again she tried to dry her tears with her hands so that she could see more clearly. Time and again she tried to jump high so that she could see beyond the wall with wire meshes and broken glasses to capture once again the image of her cousin. Then she felt that a teacher next to her was holding her tight in her arms. She led them sing aloud and the melody of love slowly reduced her pains in her heart.

The next day was another normal day. Their schedule was tight. They went to classes, English, math, French, Latin, history and Bible... Everybody was careful handling their textbooks. There were no new textbooks coming into the Camp and so they had to be very careful because the books were recycled year after year. They were careful about paper too. They used each piece of paper on both sides before they made it as scratch paper till it was torn. Tough condition could not prevent them from receiving strict training at school. They understood that it required the best to serve the Lord. When these students graduated and passed certain tests, they were all able to go to Oxford directly. During those days of busy schooling, Marjorie's heart was filled with thirst for knowledge and wisdom.

It was lunchtime. Marjorie followed everybody else to enter the dining hall. In most cases, their lunch was a bowl of corn soup and a piece of bread. There was no vegetable, let alone fish, meat and butter. It took her no time to finish it all. She even wiped the bowl clean with her fingers, but she was still hungry. She put a finger in her mouth and began to suck it like a baby to bring a little comfort to her tummy. Marjorie grew up in the rural area of Kunming, China. She led a poor life with her missionary father and she was used to any kind of food. Still in her childhood memory, she remembered her visit with her parents in Pensylvania when she was about two years old. Her little brother was born there. At that time she was able to have milk, butter, bread and fruit every day. Whenever she thought about this, her mouth watered. I thank the Lord that I still remember all the delicious dishes so that I could at least dream about them and their taste. How wonderful!

Except mealtime, however, nobody had time to think about food or to feel sad. They had to work. Marjorie's task was to pick sand and bugs from low-quality rice. Occasionally they were given some potato to improve their food and they had to help peel off the sprout. Sometimes teachers would trade their clothes for eggs. Egg white and egg yoke were given to the sick and eggshells were ground into tiny pieces so that kids who were growing teeth could take them for calcium. Although the teachers did all they could, some children still lost their newly-grown teeth. The children also had to wash their own clothes and bedsheet and they had to wash the board they slept on. A more common type of labor was to transport coal from one location to the other and pile them up. They then mixed coal with mud and water to make coal balls which, when dried up, could be stored till winter as fuel supplies.

A busy day of classes and labor was finally over. Under the sun of early fall, boys took off their shirts and girls also went barefeet. They started to play marbles or balls despite the hot weather. Even so, Marjorie was still worried that she might no longer manage to put her feet into the small shoes when winter came no matter how hard she tried.

After all Jim was a boy and he did not worry about winter shoes when it was still summer. His most favorite game was to capture a bird or two. In order to obtain permission to go to the residential areas for the Japanese soldiers to catch birds, he often approached the Japanese soldiers to teach them English. His frank and warm smile seemed to dissolve hatred so effectively that the Japanese soldiers did not interfere but they watched him climbing back and forth among the trees. Little birds, however, were only Jim's temporary partners. He usually figured out a way to send them free the next day. Watching his little partners open their wings and fly to the free sky, his heart was full of joy. He shouted: "Fly, fly! Faster and faster!"

When night came, Marjorie lay down on her bed 18 inches wide and did not go to sleep right away. She was listening to the little bird beating its wings at the window. Jim gave the bird to her. She knew that the bird would fly freely in the sky tomorrow. She also knew that the Heavenly Father would take care of these birds, let alone these lovely children of His. Despite the Japanese soldiers' heavy footsteps and their dogs barking, Marjorie had no astonishment and fear, nor resentment and melancholy. Instead she prayed for her cousin Katie. She also prayed for her parents.

Reunion on the train

In November of 1945, Canada was covered with thick white snow. Like a pair of knives, the two rails extended all the way into the heart of the central plain. The train was shaking in rhythm. Although the train behaved like a cradle, Marjorie found it hard to fall asleep till midnight. Too many memories came back to her little mind. The most memorable scene was the sudden release from the Camp.

It was August 17, over four months earlier. The hot sun almost turned the earth into a toaster. There was nobody in the playground. Then suddenly they heard the noise of airplanes, which immediately caught everybody's attention. "American planes! American planes!" Some shouted. All prisoners rushed outside and they saw an airplane flying low over the Camp. People waved and shouted hard hoping those on the airplane could hear them. A while later the plane flew back at low altitude again. It was surprising that the Japanese soldiers did not show any response. At last out of the airplane came seven parachutes, some of which landed in the cornfield just outside the Camp. Some prisoners rushed out the gate. It had been two years since anybody dared to step outside the gate without permission. But now things were different.

With tears they threw the American paratroopers in the air and caught them again. And they finally carried them on their shoulders into the Camp. They knew from these American soldiers that the war was over. From that day on, all prisoners became free. How familiar all this was! Time and again Marjorie had dreamed all of this. Every child knew very clearly that Jesus was their rock and He had the power to defeat all enemies and set them free.

In order to let the skinny children recover from malnutrition so that they could withstand the long voyage across the ocean; the American soldiers had to suppress the children's anxiety to reunite with their parents. They arranged them to continue to stay in the Camp temporarily while feeding them with air-dropped food. As they became healthier, they were then sent to Qingdao and Shanghai before they crossed the Pacific Ocean to reach San Francisco. As soon as they stepped on the American soil, Jim and Marjorie called their parents in Canada. As they heard their parents' voice over the phone, they could no longer hold their tears back.

The train went through the vast Canadian continent from Vancouver to Toronto. It failed to understand the children's anxiety as it made routine stops at every station. Why can't it go faster? Marjorie could not sleep, so she tried to identify her parents' familiar but far-away faces from her vague memory. She was afraid that she might not be able to recognize her mom and dad at the train station.

Somebody quietly knocked at the compartment door at midnight. "Is Marjorie in here please?" A strange but familiar voice woke up Marjorie, who just fell asleep a moment ago. "Please open the door. Dad is here!" How can dad come on board the train? It must be a dream. She rubbed her eyes real hard. But even if it is a dream, it is still nice to see dad.

Marjorie opened the compartment door. It was dad indeed! He extended his arms and hugged his daughter real tight. And he continually said to himself: "Thank God! Oh, thank God!"

It so happened that David and Katherine in Toronto became very anxious knowing that Jim and Marjorie were on the eastward train to come home but it would take another week or so. So dad brought their eleven-year-old brother Carl and boarded a westbound train. They met Jim and Marjorie's train in mid-way and transferred to theirs.

So the four of them reunited on the train. They sat tight together and, under the dim light, dad carefully examined his son and daughter. Jim was already a young adolescent, skinny but tall. Marjorie also became a fine young lady although the color of her eyes and the corners of her mouth still revealed the shadow of a sweet and innocent girl. Seven years of time had turned these kids into teenagers. Their parents knew, however, that God would definitely fulfill His promise and protect them in all difficult situations.

Dad took Marjorie's little hands and examined them. Her arms and wrists were very skinny. Her palms were rough and her fingernails were stained with dirt. She hadn't washed her hands with soap or applied lotion for a long time. And her hands looked like those of an old Indian woman.

It was extremely painful for dad to see his young children suffer like this in the concentration camp. He repeatedly kissed Jim and Marjorie's hands and said to them: "Children, do not blame your parents for having to send you far away..." His two children replied in unison: "Oh, no. We have never blamed dad and mom. We had a lot of joy in the concentration camp." Then with smiles they told him a lot of interesting things: Christmas and Easter in the camp, how Jim climbed the tree barefooted to catch little birds, what their favorite songs were, and how on the day of release Jim led the crowd rush out of the gate that had imprisoned them for years. Although they had to experience hunger and hardship, their memory carried a special flavor and there was no resentment.

Three days later, the train arrived in Toronto. The station was very crowded. And yet out of thousands of faces, the children were able to identify mom with their first look. "Mom, mom! We're back." Then they rushed into the arms they had dreamed about for a long time. With continual kisses and tears, they indulged themselves in family reunion. There was no time difference nor sentimental separation, as if the family hadn't really separated for seven years. A few days seemed more likely.

No more China?

It was Christmas of 1945. After seven years of separation, David and his family once again celebrated the holiday together. Outside the window was a white world. On the inside, there was the fireplace, Christmas tree, a bunch of presents along with chocolate cookies and cakes. On Christmas Eve, the whole family gathered together and sang hymns.

Since Jim and Marjorie came home, dad slept with the two sons and mom slept with the daughter. Every night before going to bed, dad and mom would spend a lot of time praying with the children in order to lead their lovely children out of the bondage of hate. The parents realized how important this period of time was for the children. It was love, and love alone, that was able to come with total forgiveness and completely free themselves from the bondage of hatred so as to start a free new life. But if there were even a little bit hatred in their heart, then the shadow of the concentration camp would negatively affect their whole life.

On Christmas Eve, all seemed to be engulfed in peace, joy and harmony when mom suddenly told Marjorie how they encountered several airstrikes in Kunming. As bombs fell from the enemy airplanes, they saw collapsed houses and falling wire poles with broken body parts on them... As the healthy servants of the Lord passed through death and blood acting as delivery messengers, the Lord reminded them to not only save lives but also to save their own souls. Do not fill your heart with hatred against the Japanese, but forgive them and pardon them and pray for their sins. This reminder shocked her. Are we supposed to forgive and pray for those murderers who have committed big crimes?

The answer from the Lord was "Yes". In the following few days, Katherine was always tearful when she prayed. She could not forgive them right away. But Jesus told her: Does the blood I shed on the Cross exclude Japanese, German or Italian people? No. I died for all the sinners of the world. They do not know what they are doing. So she submitted herself to the Lord's Cross. She prayed for the Japanese and their sins and she prayed that Jesus would pardon her for her unwillingness to forgive the enemies' crimes. And in this way she was able to free herself from the great sufferings. The more she prayed, the more she realized how pitiable the Japanese people were because sins controlled them. She was able to sincerely pray for the Japanese who had taken her children prisoners and who had committed genocide.

Having heard mom's story, Marjorie seemed to have grown up a lot. Mom's experience clearly demonstrated a Christian with love but not hate. It seemed that the Concentration Camp did not leave any sign of hate in Marjorie because of her frankness and joyfulness. Still when she saw her own rough hands, she felt really painful that she was not able to learn to play the piano at the Camp and she was not sure if she could learn at all in the future because of her hands. Mom demanded for complete and thorough forgiveness. And we should not allow even the tiniest shadow in our heart so that there would be no chance of having it grow.

That evening, Marjorie prayed to Jesus with joy: "Jesus, my Lord. On this Christmas Eve of reunion, I thank you. With your permission, I suffered a lot in my childhood. These sufferings will become blessings for my whole life. Thank you for teaching me to understand love but not hate. For this reason, I do not have the slightest resentment toward the Japanese. I pray that you bless the Japanese people on Christmas Eve. I pray you comfort those who lost their parents during the war so that they too have love, not hatred."

On a spring day in 1947 with flower fragrance floating in the air, Marjorie, like a blossoming rose, walked into a student conference. She knew the speaker would call for missionaries at the conference because the Lord wanted to dispatch additional missionaries from the American continent to spread the Good News all over the world. After seven years of separation followed by less than two years of reunion, their parents once again crossed the ocean and returned to the land of China where they had cultivated and where the civil war was heating up. They left the three children behind in America because they believed the Lord would take care of them better than they did.

Before Marjorie went to the conference, she said to herself: "Do not go back to China again. Do not answer the call. After I graduate from high school, I will go to a regular college." But then came the singing: "How many are confused and are suffering in the unpredictable worldly life? Let us hurry to bring true light to darkness so sufferers will turn into joy. Give blessings through me and glorify the Lord through me. Give blessings through me; oh lord, listen to me. Save others through me." Each verse of the hymn knocked at Marjorie's heart. Tears fell upon her cheek and she could no longer resist the inspiration from the Spirit. So she answered the call and decided to go back to China again. The Lord unambiguously told her: "Not that you have chosen me, but I have chosen you... I want you to love one another." So she stood up without hesitation.

Following her high school graduation, Marjorie went on to the Bible Institute in Philadelphia and prepared herself to be a missionary. The next year in the Institute, she got to know Walter Jackson, whom she married afterwards. After they both graduated, they very much liked to go to China. They had to give up the plan because of significant political transformation in China. In 1951, her parents also had to leave the soil, which they constantly prayed for. The Jacksons were dispatched to South America. Living in tough situation, Mr. Jackson discovered his wife was always joyful and she never complained. Years of childhood hardship enabled her to adopt a perseverant character, which became her life-long blessing. Later they participated in spreading the Gospel to the Chinese Mainland. In 1999, they thankfully went to China for a vacation. A spiritual individual ought to be like them. There is love, not hatred.

The author came from Shanghai. Once a college professor, he lives in New Jersey and teaches Chinese in Rogers University.