Writing about Life

By Xing-xue

On reading this title, you may think that I must be a professional writer or something. but actually, I am not a writer at all. At most, I am an amateur writer.

I remember one cold day in the year when I had just turned eight years old when Daddy made me wash some clothes out in the backyard. Then I had to write about the experience under the title How Daddy taught me to wash clothes. This was my very first composition. Then I had to start doing weekly writing practice with Daddy correcting and grading it all. My essays were often very badly done and I was made to polish them up over and over again. It was so boring. Mom, too, was very strict with me and made me memorize poems and idioms. She would tell me, "Good writing is the result of repeated polishing." It was only after I grew up that I realized the truth of this.

Then came the Cultural Revolution, and children were no longer made to read poetry. Overnight my parents became reactionary scholastic titans. Our family properties were confiscated. I also suffered, having been labeled as a black bastard. In order to avoid further persecution, I shut myself up at home and immersed myself in books, knowing that you could never have too much knowledge. During those years of anxious searching after knowledge, I read extensively. I also wrote a lot. I even compiled my writings into collections with elaborate prefaces. How I dreamed of becoming a writer!

Later on, all schooling was resumed, but this was followed by 'educated youth heading for the countryside to receive re-education from the poor and middle-class peasants'. I wrote an article reporting on the construction of a reservoir and it turned out to be a hit. It was published in the school journal and later was also selected to be included in A Collection of Outstanding Compositions by Middle School Students. Unfortunately a new wave of political movements killed the book before it was published. Although disappointed, I was brave enough to mail my article to several newspaper publishers. All I ever received from them was a succession of refusals. I was not at all discouraged. I just kept on sending it in.

Then the college entrance exam system was reinstated. In accordance with my father's wishes for my career I was enrolled in a medical school. But I refused to give up writing. Writing was to be my life while medical study would only be my way of making a living. In my third year in college, I unexpectedly received a copy of a school journal in which one of my writings appeared. Staring at my own writing there in print, I could hardly believe my eyes. I remembered all those years of anxiety, repeated disappointments and painful despair and now here was this unexpected joy. It seemed that my childhood dream was about to come true. Over and over again I read my little article which had finally seen the light of day after sixteen years of anticipation. I was so excited I couldn't sleep.

After that things got a lot better. My writings repeatedly appeared in school journals. My literary output covered scientific research papers as well as miscellaneous pieces, stories and prose. And things I had written also began to appear in publications at city level, provincial level and finally at national level and on Central Television. So I became a writer at national level. One of my short stories won me a literature medal for the National Health Care organization. At the same time, I didn't give up my medical career either. I was promoted to be a professor of internal medicine. Since 1993 I have had numerous opportunities to visit Europe and America and these visits have provided me with more opportunities for creative writing. I even won a medal of excellence from People's Daily Overseas Edition. I think I agree with the saying: Medicine is my wife and writing is my lover.

Shortly after I believed in the Lord, I began to consider how I could serve the Lord through my writing. So I tried to write something for Overseas Campus. They responded with much encouragement and suggestions for further polishing. One of my articles was later published in this popular publication for Chinese scholars. I was greatly encouraged, as a new believer, at having this opportunity to serve the Lord. On the advice of the editors I worked at improving my writing style. I realized that this kind of writing should not rely on literary skills or eloquent wording, but on the work of the Holy Spirit. My writing should spring out of my spiritual life. In retrospect, all my previous writings of about a thousand pieces and over one million words, had mostly been done just for the sake of writing. Few of them touched the soul and few demonstrated any kind of spirituality. Come to think of it, those writings were good for nothing.

Two years ago I was invited to attend the Overseas Campus Writers' Summer Camp, and I had the opportunity of meeting some pastors and well-known writers for the first time. My vision broadened. "Those who serve the Lord through their writings are God-sent ambassadors and mirrors reflecting the glory of the Lord." Rev. Su's words impressed me deeply and I felt a real sense of mission. So writing was no longer to be my personal hobby; it was a sacred ministry. During the three days of training, I made huge progress both in my spiritual life and in my writing skills. Today I continually arm myself with the Scriptures. I attend fellowship and church activities, and from them I draw inspiration to produce articles that are meaningful. And my spiritual life has grown along with my writing skills.

Now I find I have become less interested in playing around at empty worldly craftsmanship. Also, while once I had aimed to write for fame and profit, now I often write for The World Daily or other publications without pay. And I feel a real joy in glorifying the name of the Lord. I want to spend my limited energy and limited paper in serving the Lord. How can I do otherwise when it is the Lord who gave me these writing skills and has transformed me? I do not plan to become a great preacher, but I would like to become someone who preaches a great Lord. He must become greater; I must become less. (John 3:30) Would it not be a greater joy to receive heavenly riches and rewards from the Lord Christ Himself?

The author was a medical scholar from Shandong. He now lives in Toronto, Canada.