Words for My Daughter

I hope you will not be a flatterer. If you started showering people with ingratiating flattering smiles, I would be ashamed of you.

By Li Jie

(1)

My child, our hope for you is that you will be a person of integrity. We hope that pursuit of the truth will be the goal of your life. You may or may not become famous. You may be the boss, or the hired hand. You may be rich or poor. But we hope that no matter what you become, you would pursue after truth.

When you were very young, we had the privilege of coming to know the Lord. So we were able to teach you according to the principles of the Bible. We encouraged you to be brave while facing challenges. We encouraged you to study hard. We let you experience the joys of poetry, music, art, history and geography, and the beauties of nature. We helped you to see the limitations and corruption of human nature. We wanted you to establish healthy interpersonal relationships. All of these efforts were to nurture you to have wide interests and to be able to appreciate truth, goodness and beauty. These interests and abilities can enrich your life and they will help you cope with life's difficulties. Also they may help you see the rich feast that God has prepared for those who trust in Him.

If you seek after truth you will be special and have an attractive personality and an appealing character. No matter how beautiful a girl is, if she does not have ideals and seek after truth, she becomes ordinary and someone to be pitied.

(2)

The pursuit of ideals is always a rough road to travel. You may suffer in the process. But, my child, you should have the willingness and ability to suffer since this is the way we have tried to raise you. People who are idealists need never be full of self-pity nor discouraged. In a life that appears difficult you will see many miracles that others may not experience. Perhaps it is more comfortable to choose to be ordinary but it's never rich and fruitful.

Idealism may not give you immediate profits. It may also not give you secular gratification. Therefore, you need to be well prepared for others not appreciating you or identifying with you. Some may even pity you. But do not give way to doubts! You must learn to insist on holding on to the truth even though in the doing so you might feel lonely. The truth will never bring you shame you in the end.

Never give up your ideals for other gains! Do not change your faith to follow the trend! Let faith become bone of your bone. The material world not only has a beautiful face, it is also tempting and can make you confused. It might cause you subconsciously to give up the pursuit of your ideals. You must be very careful and learn to reject all the temptations of a false attractiveness.

If you become a beautiful young woman in your pursuit of idealism, you will be admired. The admiration and praises that come your way will be far more than you deserve and this may make you shallow. Please remember: "charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting. Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion."

(3)

You need to learn to apologize for your mistakes. No mistake is bigger than not admitting your mistake. Do not try to cover your mistake with another mistake. You need to be honest about your mistakes. Do not be controlled by sin. Stop doing evil but learn to do goodness! Treat yourself and others with love and sincerity!

You need to learn to treasure friendships. In this big wide world it is a wonderful thing to come to really know someone else. In personal relationships there can well be misunderstanding, jealousy, and hurts. Getting to know some-one else is already a miracle, so we need to be tolerant of others. You need to seek to have harmonious relationships with other people; you have so much to gain from them. Love yourself and others! Know yourself and others! Learn to forgive both yourself and others, since sometimes doing it to others is doing it to yourself!

You need to learn to appreciate tragedy. Tragedy is the consequence of human sin, so you need to understand it. You need to appreciate "being honest". You need to discern the honesty that lies underneath many outward masks.

No matter how world trends may change, a person's good character can last for ever. Many people in this world change their principles according to circumstances, but a few special people persist in their pursuit of truth always.

Sincerity is your great intangible asset. Sincerity will win you surprising glory. Sincerity is not pointing out other people's weakness. You must not use others' weaknesses to flatter yourself.

I hope that you will not long to fit into the secular world. If you started showering people with ingratiating flattering smiles, I would be ashamed of you. It may seem that you have no way of resisting the evil in the secular world, but in your heart you need to let Jesus Christ, the embodiment of the truth, be your Lord.

(4)

God created you honorable and independent. No one can destroy your honor unless you surrender it yourself. You will grow up. You will meet many who are stronger and better qualified than you are. You will feel frustrated. You may discover many of your own weaknesses and feel discouraged. So you must remember where you have come from. No matter how many weaknesses you have, you are the apple of God's eye !

I hope that whatever you say, it will be simple and to the point. You need to learn how to speak. Do not cut into others' conversations! You need to have good living habits: clean and tidy; appropriate diet; and exercise. Do not pretend to yourself! Do not limit yourself for foolish reasons! Make yourself learn new things every day. Do not think that others ought to do things for you; instead, think about how to help others! You need to learn to be willing to be taken advantage of by others, but beware of those who are never taken advantage of . Do not become indifferent to those around you! Try to be positive when communicating with others! Use your words and actions to influence those around you! Do not underestimate the effect of a good word or act! Look at ways others may be better than you. Never use clever ways to gain something for yourself ! Don't look down on things that you yourself aren't able to do! Don't waste your life!

Finally, I must tell you we ourselves are trying to put everything I've been talking about into action in our own lives, but we have not achieved them all. You are more fortunate than us, since your parents have been able to teach you this way from the time you were a little girl. We thank the Lord that we received you as a gift from God. We felt that if you became God's beloved child, that would be better than anything else.

It's not easy being our daughter. But if you work hard at it from the first, you will harvest the fruits of goodness at the end.

The writer is from Beijing,and now lives in Japan.